Wednesday, April 15, 2020
5 Bad Work Habits Gossip, Complaining, Argumentative, Antisocial, Stubborn
5 Bad Work Habits Gossip, Complaining, Argumentative, Antisocial, Stubborn Letâs face it: Office dynamics can be tricky. You may think youâre doing all the right thingsâ"when it turns out youâre actually frustrating colleagues, alienating work allies and maybe even disrespecting your boss. The possible culprit? Youâre engaging in work-related misbehaviorsâ"and donât even know it. To help pinpoint some of these faux pas, we asked career experts Dr. Kristen Lee Costa, a licensed clinical social worker who specializes in combating work stress, and workplace trends thought leader Ira S. Wolfe to weigh in on the most prevalent bad office behaviors that could be tarnishing your career. Bad Behavior #1: Youâre no social butterflyâ"and it shows. If you rush by colleagues rather than take a moment out of your hectic day to catch up, or habitually pass on offers to go out for group lunches, youâre exhibiting the classic signs of this not-so-good habit. In your zeal to get everything checked off your to-do list, you may be unknowingly leaving others with the impression that youâre unfriendlyâ"and maybe even rude. Why It Happens ⦠âPeople often end up going from meeting to meeting or task to task with very little time to come up for air,â explains Costa, author of âReset: Make the Most of Your Stress.â So while you arenât deliberately trying to isolate yourself, the truth is that you are creating a very real (and palpable) emotional distance between you and your colleagues when you donât build in even a little time for socializing. And as Costa explains, maintaining friendly working relationships isnât just key to positive office productivityâ"it also dictates an organizationâs success. What to Do If This Sounds Like You ⦠Make it a point to connect with a different colleague each week by doing something as simple as scheduling time on your calendar to take a 15-minute coffee break, suggests Wolfe, and then eventually work your way to a group lunch during a less harried workweek. The result? Over time, youâll be seen as more approachableâ"and may even make a new friend for socializing outside the confines of the office. Video Player is loading.Play VideoPlayMuteCurrent Time 0:00/Duration 0:00Loaded: 0%Stream Type LIVESeek to live, currently playing liveLIVERemaining Time -0:00 Playback Rate1xChaptersChaptersDescriptionsdescriptions off, selectedCaptionscaptions and subtitles off, selectedAudio TrackFullscreenThis is a modal window.Beginning of dialog window. Escape will cancel and close the window.TextColorWhiteBlackRedGreenBlueYellowMagentaCyanTransparencyOpaqueSemi-TransparentBackgroundColorBlackWhiteRedGreenBlueYellowMagentaCyanTransparencyOpaqueSemi-TransparentTransparentWindowColorBlackWhiteRedGreenBlueYellowMagentaCyanTransparencyTransparentSemi-TransparentOpaqueFont Size50%75%100%125%150%175%200%300%400%Text Edge StyleNoneRaisedDepressedUniformDropshadowFont FamilyProportional Sans-SerifMonospace Sans-SerifProportional SerifMonospace SerifCasualScriptSmall CapsReset restore all settings to the default valuesDoneClose Modal DialogEnd of dialog window.PlayMuteCurrent Time 0:00/Duratio n 0:00Loaded: 0%Stream Type LIVESeek to live, currently playing liveLIVERemaining Time -0:00 Playback Rate1xFullscreen Bad Behavior #2: You react poorly to sudden change. Stay the course! If you abide by this mantra to a faultâ"say, when you get angry if your boss asks you to do a last-minute project, or you get frustrated by having to do something someone elseâs wayâ"you could be branded as rigid and difficult. Why It Happens ⦠âBeing [perceived as] too rigid is often due to being a âblack-and-whiteâ thinker,â explains Costa. Translation: You have a hard time accepting the reality that sometimes things wonât go your way. Wolfe offers up another common reasoning: Often, people who react badly to a new, unexpected askâ"or even the mere suggestion to do something differentlyâ"are really just scared that they wonât be able to do it well. What to Do If This Sounds Like You ⦠If your natural response to change is to dig in your heels, try to force yourself to shift gears anywayâ"because, as Wolfe notes, being viewed as resistant to change could potentially cost you your job. And if you believe your mental hurdle is rooted in uncertainty about tackling the task at hand, thatâs O.K. A bit of insecurity is normalâ"but you canât let it paralyze you. So think about what would happen if you did the task wrong. If itâs something that could be easily fixed, try to push ahead. âTaking risks is part of what builds resilience, and it can teach us an incredible amount,â Costa says. But if youâre truly scared the task is more than you can handle, âthe best thing you can do is find a mentorâ"someone you can trust to help you learn what you need to learn,â Wolfe says. Bad Behavior #3: Youâre the office gossip. While it can be beneficial to keep your ear to the ground about office happenings, you donât want to be known as the person who always has the latest dirt. With this office misbehavior, not only do you risk being perceived as untrustworthyâ"but, inevitably, something you said will get back to the person you said it about. Why It Happens ⦠Water cooler chitchat often starts off innocently as a way to bond with colleaguesâ"but it has the potential to quickly spiral into repeat bad behavior if you habitually gossip with the wrong crowd. What to Do If This Sounds Like You ⦠Dial back on the dishingâ"statâ"by shifting the discussion to a more positive place the next time someone wants to chat about the latest departmental drama. âYou want to have plenty of verbal exit strategies in your arsenal,â Costa says. âSome of my favorites: âYes, that person can come off as bossy, but I also think she has a lot of leadership potentialâ and âI understand youâre really frustrated right now, and I am happy to talk with you later, once youâve had some time to decompress a bit.ââ You should also examine why youâre gossiping in the first place. If youâre miffed by a colleagueâs behavior or have a problem with the quality of their work, gossiping isnât going to solve the problem. Instead, speak to them directly about your concerns, or come up with another solution to help keep the peaceâ"and the work on track. Read next: How to Deal With Your Colleagueâs Gross Work Habits Bad Behavior #4: Youâre not shy about voicing your opinions. Does the idea of getting into a good debate at work excite you? Are you always the first to chime in during meetingsâ"and often talk over others in the room? Well, guess what? What you believe is showing passion for your job is probably being construed as being confrontational. âIf youâre branded as being too argumentative, it will cause people to take you less seriouslyâ"even when you have a rational, legitimate gripe,â Costa says. âIt leads to low trust, and as a result, people will often avoid you.â Why This Happens ⦠While you may believe that youâre simply making a strong point or standing up for what you believe in, other people may feel youâre challenging themâ"in a big way. Bottom line: People in this camp tend not to pay enough attention to how others communicate and interactâ"they need to be better about picking up on social cues by doing more looking and listening and less talking. What to Do If This Sounds Like You ⦠A good first step is to focus on more inclusive phrasing when youâre interacting with colleagues. For example, if you find yourself saying âyouâ a lotâ"âyou havenât scheduled enough time to do this projectââ"your language is likely to come off as sounding accusatory. So try to focus on âIâ or âweâ phrasing instead, such as âI think that, in the time available, we could achieve the first part of this project, and then we can figure out a way to bake in more time to finish it.â By using more âwe are all in this togetherâ phrasing, says Costa, you set the scene for a more collaborative experience. And if youâre the kind of person who struggles to wait your turn to talk in meetings, Costa recommends writing down your thoughts firstâ"and only jumping in with an opinion or insight when the time is right. Bad Behavior #5: Youâre the office complainer. Itâs easy to gripe about problems at work with co-workers. But what can feel like a moment of solidarity with cube-mates can quickly turn into a pattern of seeing (and sharing) only the worst things about work. Why This Happens ⦠According to Costa, insecurity is often the underlying reason behind chronic negativityâ"itâs easier to complain than to take real action to deal with a problem or obstacle at work. âWe get something out of commiserating with others,â she says. âHowever, this behavior can be toxic and eventually damage your reputation. It can also make you lose focus on the great people and good aspects of your work.â What to Do If This Sounds Like You ⦠If youâre someone whoâs gotten into the habit of complaining, you should try âreframeâ your mind-set, says Costa. âLook at the positives of every project and the things that are working well, instead of what isnât,â she explains, adding that sometimes this simple exercise can really turn things around. And if you feel that your negativity stems from deep-seated insecurity at work, Costa suggests working on developing an excellent support systemâ"in the form of trusted peers and mentors who can provide insight on how to tackle tough projects on the job. Of course, this isnât to say you canât occasionally vent or push back on something you care about. The key is to not let your frustration or passion sabotage your success. Read next: How to Keep an Office Romance from Destroying Your Career More From LearnVest: 10 Tough-But-Valuable Career Lessons to Learn by 30 3 People, 3 Career 180s: âHow I Reinvented Myself After 30' 4 Intrepid People Dish: âMy Crazy, Risky Career Move ⦠That Paid Off!â
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